The cycle of love and solitude
my experience with love...
Closeups can be found here: [link]
Please take the time to read the story before looking at image, because it's pointles
to just look at it without knowing the story, believe me.
Concept/Story behind it all
Before September, 2003, my life was quite boring, I had no expectations as of what was about to happen...
In September, 2003, I had fell in love with a girl...this girl was so down to earth, fun to be with,
adorable, caring, any the list goes on...let's just say it was everything I could wish for. Thankfully,
she had felt the same for me, on November 5th, 2003, we officially started dating. For the next 2 years,
our love developed rapidly and deeply, it had seem to us that we were married. There was nothing that we
cannot tell each other, nothing that we cannot do together, I felt like I was in heaven.
Unfortunately, things had started to change, there were signs of her losing feelings...I've tried so hard to recover
the lost love she had for me...but no matter how hard I tried, things would only seem to go downhill. Early
September, 2005, I confronted her about the problems I've been noticing and her behavior towards me nowadays...
and indeed, she had finally admitted that she had lost feelings for me. The reason? Because it's been too long.
It never occured to me that being in love with someone so much, the feelings could simply dissolve because of time.
We officially broke up after that conversation. I never blamed her for breaking up like that, because she had simply
followed what her heart told her, perhaps it was something I did that made her start loosing feelings. Whatever it may
be, it wasn't her fault.
For the next 2 months, I still tried my best to recover her, perhaps finding a way to erupt her feelings again. I tried and
tried...because I valued this relationship more than living itself. And in the end, I was rejected countless times..now it
seems as if I cannot even be her friend. It really hurts...and to this day, 6 months after breaking up, I'm still hurt...I still
constantly think about her. Could someone tell me why?
When we were together for the 2 years, I felt so good, so inspired by life itself, I enjoyed everything I could possibly do/get.
I had realized that without that love, I feel so empty. Whenever I listen to the music I used to listen to and do the things I used
to do, I feel as though something's missing, I do not know what, but it's like I'm just a shell now. It's back to the days of life
before September 2003, the days of solitude...
The actual image
Everything in these set of images were done in cinema4D, even the sky. The only postwork is the bird silouhettes.
This piece was also to push myself further as a artist, I wanted to see if I would be able to set a different mood/feeling with the
exact same render, exact same scene, but with variation in angle and placement of render. I am quite satisfied with the result, I think
I have conveyed my ideas well.
The first panel
- The first panel is suppose to show "love is in the air", with all the optimism, hope, and everything
good that you feel when you are first in love with someone. That's why I had created a render with wings and hearts.The birds were
placed in the way that's suppose to make the viewer feel "optimism" the first panel is to summarize everything I had felt in the first 2
years with my ex-girlfriend, Sharon.
The second panel
- The second panel demonstrates the downfall of the relationship. I had attempted to place the 2
renders in a way that makes them look kind of shy, turned away, and depressed. The energetic birds from the first panel is now scattered
and hearts(representing our love) are falling onto the floor now.
The third panel
- Last but not least, the final panel is to show solitude. I tried to emulate the feeling by having such an
angle/perspective. There is only 1 render now(hence solitude) which is cut off half way up. That is to show the lonliness, anoymous, and
boredom aspects of solitude. There is no energy in this final panel, nothing inspiring, just plain as ever.
This piece is also to serve as a tribute to 2 of my favorite surreal artists, Salvador Dali and Rene Magritte. If you guys search their names
on google, i'm sure you'll find the similarity in style. That's all folks, I hope you guys like this and the meaning behind it all.
Original @ 2400x5800 @ 300dpi
The fifth order.